Saturday, December 13, 2008

It's not all in the family




     Like everyone else's families who do not live in Japan. My family does not understand JE. But when I think about it, how could they? JE isn't exactly what you'd call "family friendly." 

     Whenever my brother uses the mac, he gets confused with the wallpaper I use. He thinks Tegoshi is a girl. Actually, he thinks Tegoshi is the same GIRL in Hana Kimi. Which I have to agree, is kind of understandable. Even I think Tegoshi and Maki look alike. He also thinks Massu is like...12 and therefore, his sister (me!) is a PEDO. Well LA-DI-DA! Guess i'm in the same league as the great JOHNNY KITAGAWA himself. (At least we have something in common.) Well, I guess I can be proud of the fact that I never fangirl'd HSJ! Imagine if it was Chinen?! I'd be like... serving sentence by now.  

     My sister cannot understand how Kame is NOT gay. (I never did tell her that Kame is indeed gay. i don't have enough proof!) Considering that she plucks her eyebrows like, every weekend. I get her issues with the turtle. Especially since Kame's eyebrows still look better than hers. Another thing that bothers her are Yamapi's moobs. She thinks it's all PHOTOSHOPPED. Owing to the fact that Yamapi isn't even fat enough to have MOOBS. I personally don't care how those moobies are made. As long as they're connected to Pi's chest and they're NOT LACTATING, I am HAPPY. 

     I fear the day my mother shall ever get to meet KATTUN. I don't think their see-through clothes, dead animals and phallic earrings will convince her that they're wholesome and some of the members probably never had women sex in their lives. So it's not like I even had the chance to miss anything. She doesn't exactly have to worry about my sanity and my taste in men. Or woman. Whatever. The point is, with the way KATTUN dresses, no matter how much I tell her that, "MOM! They're like, totally GHEI!" I doubt she'll ever believe me. 

     My elder brother laughs in my face. Mainly because he caught me watching Arashi in a dress and needless to say, he never let me forget about it. Lesson learned? It's better to be caught watching porn than to be caught watching men in drag. Because apparently, hardcore porn is a hundred times more normal than men in wigs. I'm only thankful it was Arashi and not Kanjani8 in their ranger costumes. I can only imagine what kind of jokes my brother can come up with once he sees Yasu being molested by ...oh, I don't know. The WHOLE band? 

     My friends are a different matter altogether. My bf thinks that Bakanishi is GOD and we should all be a slave to his fat hips. I beg to differ, as much as I like Jin's hip-rolling prowess, I never want to be a slave to that. NOT, when MatsuJun can still do the amazing catwalk he does. 

     A gay friend is totally convinced that Shige slept with all the members of NEWS. Of course, I had to defend law boy and say, "Puhleeze! Shige?! You must be thinking of Tegoshi or Pi!" And he was like:

"Try to notice the way he walks and when he dances and shakes his hips. He was fucked. HARD." 

     To be honest, I still think it's all Koyama's fault. Shige couldn't have slept with the entire band.('cept for Kei) If he did, his hips would have pawned Jin's by now. 

A girl friend THINKS Takky slept with the entire JE management.

You and the rest of the world, sweetie. 


  

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I just found this on google blogsearch. I'm a JE fan myself. It made me smile and basically made my evening. You have a great sense of humor. ^o^

shingung said...

c0rin...i miss your JE blabbers...hehehee...

but i do agree with you...its not all in the family...my sister only likes maki and the whole hanakimi lead cast...

my youngest brother only knows ikuta toma and probably likes him too much...

as for my friends...they all said im an addict...we certainly discussed jdoramas..but not too much JE fandom...(or maybe they thought we are all too old for that...)bwahahhaa

and im glad i've met someone like you who are fangirls...JE fandom or anything....

c0rin said...

@Anon: Thanks. I seem to be known for my sense of humor. I never really thought of myself as funny.

@Shingung: Haha. Thanks. Well, as long as your brother doesn't end up liking MatsuJun, the world is safe. I have it on authority that any boy who likes MJ always end up gay.

I actually don't have a lot of friends who are into JE. My bf is only in it for the boys. As for the other friends I mentioned, it's because I keep talking about them, and since they're my friends, they listen even when they don't really get it. Lol.

lilly93 said...

well i have like 34 friends who are into anime/manga/asian drama n stuff from japan but nonw of them really knows about JE. and the one who probably should know themost gives a crap about names and just watched the drama and movies... and another one never seems to be able to remember their name... even tho she likes them.. n third one doesnt really care n fourth one hasnt really watched anythin except for the basic like HYD and Hana Kimi... while i am a totall JE addict! btw ill ignore all that guy nonsense... xD except for the all guys who like MJ end up gayxD but damn girl LOVE ur humour!! if i feel a bit down or bored i just come here n read one of ur stories^^ ur relly good!! keep working hard!!^^

c0rin said...

@Lilly: I guess we're all the same then! I personally think MatsuJun's gay. I mean, all the gays are attracted to him! It's really ....weird!

Thanks, I don't really work too hard though. I'm very lazy to the point of not moving for 6 hours. Haha.